In what amounted to a proverbial tar and feathering of the Franklin Farce, the Art Museum grabbed the reigns of their griffon war machine and laid bloody thunder to the land one base at a time. Not hell nor high water could step in the way of the mighty griffons, who with the power of the double wall disregarded all morals and ethics in their abuse of every patch of outfield grass beyond the reach of the (supposedly) honorable franklin defenders. When the dust was settled and the losing generals presented their arms over in defeat, the score was decisive. 10 runs would prove not to be enough to match the 12 faithfully scored by the griffons in the name of all that is winged and mighty. This effort was surely one of a solid team, but it would be remiss not to mention individual efforts that remind the more poetic among us of the likes of King Leonidas, or perhaps even Robert Redford.
Throughout the game both teams showed why they are among the strongest in the league. Apart from a few miscues, The Machine and The Farce played the hell out of defense - surely the two most well-matched defenses in the league. Leather was flashed pretty much everywhere except for short on both sides. I don't think Ryan and Cal have ever been lonelier on the defensive side of the ball with a combined 4 putouts. In the end though, it amounted to a few more timely hits by The Machine that gave them the edge. Both Jeremy and Falcone led the charge in that department, each going 3 for 3. When asked about it after the game, Falcone (after taking his last swig of Evan Williams) was quoted as saying, "Oh fuck, am I late for the game, I think I blacked out there for a minute." All in all, lots of anxiety, lots of defense and LOTS of beers.
PMA Fantasy Tracker:
Major pointage was delivered by the right side of the outfield in the softball clinic held by the griffons Tuesday. Brooks and Kyle, channeling their inner spirit animals – the arctic fox and the narwhal, for those inquiring minds among us – scoffed at the thought of using modern technology and manned our overgrown right field sans cleats. Brooks at one point had to scale over a field goal post, mistakenly left in fair territory, into knee high weeds to just barely miss making a willie mays catch on what was surely a homerun ball at any field contained by fences. The catch would have been so amazing, the say hey kid himself agreed in an exclusive griffons softball interview that he’d have to rescind his status as the man who first made a willie mays catch. Based on their performances, it is now being speculated that Kyle and Brooks may be the two additional secret cybernetic beings fathered by Arnold Schwarzenneger, according to Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.
What To Watch For:
Well, I wouldn't hold your breath for Rapture. How long are we going to keep letting this proselytizing fuck make outrageous claims? Even worse, everyone who paid him any mind - including (at this moment) the author of this post. Moving on, look for The Machine to begin suring up the core of their batting line-up as we role into the second have of the season. Of equal note, apparently Olympic Motorboating has been discontinued since 1908, so I'll have to check back with The Farce's Ryan Whitmarsh to see how he and his two other Olympic hopefuls ( Cal of The Machine and Phyllis of "The Rape Cave" ) will be lobbying to reintroduce the event in perhaps a more intimate capacity.
Really?
Bob Ford was there. He was quoted as saying, "Science and art is stupid." I'm sure you can appreciate the irony.
